Firstly I was thinking about feminism, specifically among Christian women who get so very ruffled over the word "submit". I was thinking that men are given the harder job when they are told to love their wife as Christ loves and to give themselves up for her even as Christ gave himself up for the Church.
Did you catch that? Read it again.
It boils down to trust. Do I trust my husband to love me that way, that completely, that sacrificially? Hell, do I trust him to simply love me as a faithful and affectionate partner, maybe not to that extent, but a "reasonable" amount? Well then wouldn't I trust that he would want what's best for me, what makes me happy and healthy and satisfied? If I said I refused to buy into the idea of submission I'm saying I think all he wants is to have power over me and once he gets it he'll use it to abuse me, OR I'm saying I think he's too incompetent to make good decisions that I would agree with...why would I marry someone I thought either that mean-spirited or that stupid?
I do trust my future husband. I know he would give his life for me and not just because he's said it but because I have bone-deep knowledge of his truthfulness. I'm not afraid to submit or even *gasp* use the word obey because he would never ask me to do something that I had a sincere objection to. Note that a sincere objection is not mere whining when he encourages me to work out or eat healthy, obviously those are good things to prod me to do.
There is a Sara Teasdale poem I love that I have quoted to him, and the last couple lines are "And 'Master' I will say to you/because you never asked me to." That sort of says it all I think.
The second thing I was thinking about was the current controversy about the Seattle cop who shot a wood-carver who was walking down the street with a knife...
I can't say whether the officer was right to shoot that man, but the arguments that people are using do concern me a bit.
The question of time and the threat...a human being can cover a pretty good distance in only a second, so someone with a knife within a hundred feet of me? I'd consider that potentially threatening, of course depending on context. Also a bulletproof vest can be easily circumvented with a knife, there are many uncovered areas that bleed seriously, an officer doesn't feel invincible in one I'm sure.
Police officers, Federal agents, those in the military, are often asked to make life or death decisions very quickly and hesitation can mean death for them or bystanders. They have a heavy responsibility. Sometime they make the wrong call.
Several months ago I read "Generation Kill" and discussed it as I went with my love. It described some terrible realities of urban warfare with a non-uniformed enemy that our military faced in Iraq. There were times that Marines had to take out a vehicle that showed no intention of stopping at a checkpoint only to find it was scared civilians they had killed. There was one account of a young boy being killed. I remember the way my eyes teared up when I talked about these horrible possibilities with my fiancé, then boyfriend.
What I said to him I would want to say to every person who puts on a uniform and goes out to try to make this country or this world a safer place for me and you and everyone and struggles with these decisions.
"Hindsight is 20/20. I was not there, in that moment, I don't know what had to go into that decision, I can have no idea what that felt like. All I want is for you not to hesitate because I don't want you to hold back and get hurt or killed. I want you to come home safe."
Of course for my love, when he asked if I would hate him for making a mistake, I added that I valued his life more than many lives of people I'd never met and never would, and would he hate me for that selfishness?
I just don't want to see our law enforcement crippled by hesitation worrying about their careers and lawsuits and media crucifixion...yes, they do need accountability and there are definite boundaries, they don't get carte blanche for wearing a badge...but I don't want good men and women to be injured or killed while they flinch at the thought of the press hounding them about their decisions.
5 comments:
question: have you watched the video? and you do know that the officer did not follow protocol-- even before he considered it a threat, right? Are you also aware that the victim was deaf and could not hear the officer?
(what i mean to say is that there are legitimacy behind those arguments)
Yes, wasn't familiar enough with police protocol to have said, and no...I did say that I didn't know whether that officer in particular was right or wrong, and certainly there are legitimate arguments aside from the ones that were rubbing me the wrong way. What I was thinking in particular was a woman who exclaimed that she didn't understand how someone with a gun and bulletproof vest could feel afraid. I just see a trend of trying police officers in the media and I don't want it to make good officers who *are* making good decisions to hesitate.
yeah. i understand. it's just, like you said on FB, controversial :)
If pressed I'd probably say that he acted wrongly, he screwed up, but I don't think he left the station goin "I think I'll find an excuse to kill someone today", I think that in that moment he believed in what he did, maybe not later with the clarity of hindsight. He has to live with that now. I almost feel like there are people who want to paint him as cold blooded and calculating rather than a man who seriously messed up in a heated moment where he likely panicked a bit.
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